zooming out and showing up.

Sitting alone in my apartment, typing out these words deep into my second cup of strong black coffee, I’ve been wondering…

What does it mean to show up for myself… and I mean really show up for myself?

After three months in Costa Rica, immersed in a beautiful community and jungle living, I left the Caribbean coast for the excitement of a new location boasting rich culture, history, and vibrancy in the heart of the desert and surrounding mountains in Oaxaca City, Mexico.

I love solo travel and new experiences, the freedom and possibility when you’re the one calling all the shots. It’s exciting, immersive, scary, and a chance to know yourself better! But it also comes with its challenges such as always being on your toes, finding a healthy community, wanting to share those meaningful moments with others and constantly being reminded to let go and surrender.

With excitement and anticipation towards Oaxaca, I made the move and transitioned into a solid routine. Enamoured by the thrill of a new location I was thriving in my first few weeks here, but as the days wore on I started to get in my head. At times, it’s been interesting to witness old stories and beliefs creeping up in the background - limiting beliefs, scarcity mindset, and the old thought patterns resurfacing. And while it has felt challenging at times, moving at a slower pace while being alone here has also granted me the time and space to question if those thoughts have been serving me and to really look inward.  It truly makes me thankful for every passing year,  as I’ve come to understand pieces of myself better (while also simultaneously questioning all of us making our way through these wild human experiences).  

However, the difficulties that arose in my mind allowed me to turn my focus to the concept of zooming out.  Like a camera, pulling back and widening my perspective to see the bigger picture. It’s allowed me to look at things differently and ‘remove’ myself from one single moment, while having more acceptance and grace.

I’ve been nomadic for the better part of the last five years and in the challenging moments I wonder what brings me to continue doing it, but when taking a step back and looking at the whole picture, I know those moments have significance and their place in my story. They are the moments that force you to be more inquisitive and seek greater understanding. And in those moments, I have found the need for a greater look outside of a single thought pattern to rise and give perspective.

A perspective of what matters most to you.

A perspective of how you handle adversity.

A perspective of how to find peace within yourself. 

A perspective of if your thoughts, feelings and actions are in alignment with the life you want to live.

And a perspective of how you can use that knowledge to show up as your best self for others and for the world. 

With my time in Mexico quickly coming to a close, I’m reminded of how precious this one life we get to live is.  There is SO much going on in the world at this time. And honestly, I’ve been wary of writing and putting words out there, for additional noise and insignificance with so much else going on in the world. But when I zoom out and shift my perspective, I am reminded of our collective need to continue showing up as best we can for ourselves and others, in whatever form that may take.

I get a kick out of my younger self, in my early 20s, stoked on the concept of personal growth and expansion. I didn’t realize at the time that profound growth and healing takes WORK. It means being still and sitting with your emotions, discomforts, and the creeping voices in your head. It’s hard and messy but incredibly worth it.

And in the moments when it all feels overwhelming, I just keep whispering to myself ‘zoom out’ and that’s when I feel more acceptance towards that particular moment in the totality of my story. Because that is what is necessary for us to evolve and truly understand what it means to show up for ourselves with honesty, compassion, unconditional (and sometimes tough) love.

And at the end of the day, we are all here as little specks on this spinning ball in the universe just trying to figure this whole ‘life’ thing out - and that’s pretty dang cool.